A 54-year-old man in Lusaka, Zambia, shocked a courtroom when he complained about his wife’s appearance, comparing her body to “bathroom slippers” and a “zebra.” His remarks turned a serious legal matter into an unexpected comedy show.
The man, whose name was not disclosed, was at the Matero Court seeking a divorce. While pleading his case, he told the judge that his wife no longer looked like the woman he married 18 years ago.
“My Lord, I feel like I’m sleeping next to a fellow man!” he exclaimed dramatically.
As the courtroom murmured in disbelief, he added, “Her chest is like bathroom slippers, and her belly looks like a zebra!” Some people gasped, while others couldn’t hold back their laughter.
A Debate Breaks Out in Court
The judge, trying to stay serious, asked him, “So you’re blaming time and motherhood for your loss of attraction?”
Before he could respond, voices in the courtroom chimed in. Some women shook their heads in disapproval. One woman even shouted, “Before you talk about bathroom slippers, let’s see your six-pack! Oh wait, I meant your one-pack!”
Unfazed, the man continued, claiming, “All men are born with this virus of looking outside. It’s in our blood!” He pounded his chest, as if making a grand statement.
His comments drew even more reactions. Another woman in the crowd shot back, “If it’s a virus, then you need a vaccine called ‘good manners!’”
The Judge’s Wise Words
As the courtroom buzzed with laughter and side comments, the judge took a moment to remind everyone what marriage is truly about.
“Marriage is not about six-packs or smooth bellies,” he said. “It’s about love, respect, and appreciating the sacrifices your partner makes.”
Then, looking straight at the man, the judge added with a slight smile, “And sir, before you criticize someone’s looks, maybe check the mirror first. You’re not exactly sparkling yourself.”
The Verdict? A Lesson in Love
As the court session ended, people outside the courtroom continued discussing the case. Some women defended the wife, saying “Those ‘zebra stripes’ are marks of motherhood—he should be grateful!”
Meanwhile, one man whispered, “This guy just ended his marriage today. Someone should call the fire brigade—his house is in trouble tonight!”
Although the case wasn’t officially settled in court, one thing was clear: Zambians never miss a chance for humor, even in the most unexpected places!
